Eyeshadow on my hand

Acupuncture is changing my life.  I’m sleeping better, getting up with a skippy step in the morning, and walking taller.  I look forward to Saturday mornings, to seeing Maura (‘puncturer exraordinaire), and to the deep rest I get while those needles do what they do best:  Puncture. I’m not sure how it works or why, I’m just sure that it does.

Lifechange has been on my mind quite a bit lately.  Lifechange, like lifestyle, is a set of choices.  T-bone or salmon, heels or flats, truth or lie, live or die.  My biggest choices are those I make when no one is watching because its within the folds of time that are hidden from public view that define my character with a carving knife that is integrity and sand paper of grace.  Fine grit leaves the most lustrous finish.  Choices.  The sum of which is the whole.

So, while my choice to obey the mystery of acupuncture alters my posture, other lifechange creeps in and the spine of my soul unfurls.  I apply prayer in the morning along with eyeshadow.  My eyes are changed.  I pluck weeds from the earthy plot surrounding my home and excavate deep rooted fears and insecurities.  They slowly make it to the trash bin, sometimes sitting near the garage for a week, baking in the sun.  I wear gloves.  Daydreams and dreamstorms dance in the sky and rain down on my head.  Flat hair, still heart.

Lifechange happens in layers, with different shades, and requires different tools for different looks.  My eyeshadow goes on the same way.  Raw color on the top of my left hand.  Carefully selected tool in my right.  Pick up color, draw on, brush on, smudge, and blend.  When all the work is done, the top of my hand is stained with remnants of pigment that now frames my vision of the world.

Acupuncture leaves bruises sometimes, too.  There’s one on my hand right now.  Change is a set of choices, a selection of colors, the embrace of mystery, and moments of satisfaction among the folds of time that wrap us in quiet moments that belong to the heart, bruises and all.


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